sadness

Rain

​The sky turns dark and grey
Much alike my foul mood
I had no inclination to watch
Yet by the sight I was glued

Mesmerized as the clouds drew close
Discerned the faint rumble of thunder
Watched as lightening blazed trails
Watched the rain as the clouds broke asunder

I desired not for a wet bed
I moved to close the window
Dark room with no power
Wind blown out the only candle

The smell hits my nose
Smell that reminds me of home
Of Earth quenching it’s thirst
Of wet mud, silt and loam

Yet I could not ignore the water
Reason begged with me
Heart told me to watch the rain
Beauty I could not fail to see

Sitting by the window
I watch the raindrops slide down
Racing past one another
Are they trying to wipe my frown?

The rain slowly abated
Earth’s thirst quenched again
Likewise my mood considerably changed
A smile where a frown had lain
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Take A Bullet

​Six months since you left
Said you were tired of being with me
Gave me a whole lot of reasons
Reasons I couldn’t fathom nor see

And so two years came to an abrupt end
Dreams smashed to smithereens
“Oh it wasn’t real love for you.
I was just being a stupid teen.”

You moved on with college and friends
Made a life out for yourself
Dumb me sat around moping
Pushed dreams and passions into shelves

Time and again I tried to climb the peak
Landslides kept pushing me down
I could never quite heal myself
Like happiness didn’t want to be found

How do you find it to move on
From the person you once lived your life for?
How do you heal from the hurt
When everything you love turned sour?

What was once beautiful white
Now a sickening shade of black
You might bring it to a dull gray
But the magic will never come back

Watching them moving on from you
While you’re still grieving
You do anything to stay sane
Anything you can do to keep breathing

Like a gunshot slamming into you
The reason for which you can’t quite figure
The person you’d take a bullet for
Is the one pulling the trigger

And you lie there bleeding
Bleeding heavily from the exit wound
Knowing your heart will never be the same
Praying God will take you soon
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The Road More Travelled By


God I can’t take it anymore
The burning inside my head
It’s eating me from the inside
Tears try in vain to quench

Everyday is a torture to pass through
Walking on searing hot coal
The pain has dimmed my senses
Gnawing away at my soul

But you have to hide the pain
Go and put on the anonymity mask
Lest be ostracized and put to shame
Why make difficult the arduous task?

There’s no choice but to move on
No hope of turning back
Trudge along until I reach the shore
Already stepped into the quicksand

Each day I ask myself
Will I ever feel less terrible?
I traded dreams for something I despise
In hopes of something now unattainable

I don’t know why I did it
Though at the time it made sense
I took the road more travelled by
And that has made all the difference

Picture Courtesy: http://www.jcstick.com.br

Dark Skies

​The sun shining through the leaves
Wind rustling the green trees
Birds flitting through the eaves
Could anyone a better morning see

Walking through the park
Soft grass beneath my feet
Like a rainbow you appeared
Was this coincidence or us destined to meet

Ten and four months ago
Had I last seen your face
Oh how did I think to let you leave
Think someone could fill that space

Sitting in the little cafe
Your fingers curled around a cup of coffee
The sight of you turned me breathless
How I wished your radiant smile turn on me

I took a tentative step forward
Hoping for the times of old
Memories we had, dreams yet to be
On your little laugh, I was long sold

Like a thunderbolt he appeared
Leather jacket, fair and handsome
The love in your eyes at his sight
My patched up heart came undone

You leaned deep into his kiss
Put his arms tight around did he
Oh how my heart burned when you looked at him
Because that was how you used to look at me

Picked you up and walked away
The happy couple and the sunset
How I wished my light would fade
How I longed for the chimes of death

Because I can’t stand the haunting dreams
Promises that turned out to be lies
There was nothing for me to live for
You darkened the cheerful skies

Waiting

Cute little one
Frantically wagging his tail
Eyes full of love
Never a reason to wail

For he cared about one
His lovely mistress
She was his entire world
Woke up just for her caress

She dictated his every emotion
Sad or happy each day
His biggest joy was in
The loving words she would say

And she loved him so
Let him know at every opportunity
Kissed him, cuddled and caressed
Loved him in all sincerity

But times did change
Lost interest in him
She had other people around
To fulfill her whims

He got pushed down
He who had been around so long
She wanted the new ones
Said that’s where she belonged

Long did he sit and wait
With big, doleful eyes
Lost interest in everything
Even the scuppering mice

Did everything to get her back
All of his merry antics
Noted with a scornful smile
Left him with memories of her magic

Yet he still waited
For her to come back
They said he was doing it in vain
But his love would never slack

Sunshine and Rainbows

Waves streaked with red
Strike these eternal shores
Failures abound in plenty
At these damnation doors

Here lie failures of many
Dreams that did not make it through
Carefully nursed hopes discarded
Long gone the willpower to do

Why must we move on
Endure the endless tirade
Looking through the lying kaleidoscope
Success isn’t for us made

A giant Wolf-Rayet star
Now reduced to a blackhole
For aren’t we mere husks
Shells with no soul

Born to be a shame
Doomed to eternal failure
Black sheep of the lot
Hopes do falter

Will I leave this tesseract
Decrypt the engraved heiorglyphs?
Nay, do not delude yourself
Success is only a myth

And so forever shall we trudge
Pinpricks among the many
Let us keep from being trampled by those above
Why add to existing scars?

Brothers and sisters in shame
I join thee in your misery
The world isn’t sunshine and rainbows
Someday we shall escape this absurdity

I Miss You

Moonlight streams through window
Stars lean to kiss you
Though I see the same stars
I lie here and miss you

A bottle of your scent
Sprayed on my pillow
Reminds me of you
I miss your presence though

So far away from you
i watch the night turn blue
It’s so beautiful but
Not the same without you

I long for my arms around you
Wrap you in tight
Let you know you’re safe
Shield you from unfriendly sight

Feel your chest rise and fall
With every breath you take
The loneliness I feel
Your presence will abate

Feel your little body
Pressed tight into me
Knowing you mine and I yours
The happiest I can be

Should nightmares come a calling
I will be your shield
Beat them back away
In my arms comfort sealed

I eagerly wait for the day
To come back to my love
But I want it to be now
Because I miss you

 

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